The Know It A-Hole
October 15th 2011 12:55
It used to be that the kindly Know It All would wait until asked and then would tell you more than you ever wanted to know about whatever you asked. Generally speaking, the most annoying thing about this ancient brand of know-it-all was that once you got him talking, it was difficult to get him to shut up.
The internet allows everyone who was raised by wolves or idiotic parents and whose teachers were the lowest order of moron to expose himself in public.
Have you ever casually glanced at the comments on some web site like YouTube and seen several explanations about what the band was trying get at with their song? If the list of comments is long enough and you keep looking, you will almost certainly come upon the gratuitous stupidity of the Know It A-Hole.
The Know it A-Hole says that everybody everywhere knows everything and nobody anywhere should try to explain anything and that if somebody somewhere does try to explain something they are stupid, annoying and pedantic.
One can only borrow a phrase from the bard and say that the Know It A-Hole is a colossal jewel of glittering ignorance.
No one knows everything. No one was born knowing everything. Moreover, there are many people from foreign countries and foreign cultures who speak foreign languages to whom it might not be immediately obvious that the flying chair in a rock music video was not a allusion to magic or spirits but rather to the American expression: "getting high." Furthermore, given the presence of drugs in certain cultural traditions and religious practices, one might draw interesting parallels by purposefully not "getting it" and instead going off on an intriguing tangent.
Seriously, if the meaning or intent of something is so obvious to you that you are offended by explanations, you are in the wrong place and even the wrong world. You are like that guy on that commercial who said that he had seen all of the internet. In his case it was a joke, in your case, I think you are just lying--after all, how would we really know that you understand anything since you conveniently wait until after everyone else has explained the subject at hand.
There are counter examples to almost everything. If you do have a friend who is the master of the obvious and who has the habit of explaining everything you just saw on the movie whether you asked him or not, he needs to be gently reminded that this is not a character trait you seek in amiable companion. But there is no need to be abrasive or to use expletives as the rude on the internet tend to do.
And if you are an advanced student in any subject, and it is time to explain an advanced concept to your fellow students or your teachers, people are going to be real annoyed if you start explaining concepts from a beginner's perspective. But once again, the exception proves the rule. Notice the venue. You know everyone present already knows the basics. This is very different from a YouTube web page wherein you can be almost certain that at least one visitor will not understand what is going on or why it is happening.
For those who are bored by a world that continuously repeats mundane explanations for the uninitiated, I would suggest that a solitary hermitage out in the woods would be more to your liking. You can look in the mirror once in awhile and surprise yourself. Practice sneaking up on yourself.
Dear Know It A-Hole: Shut up and sit down Bozo, the rest of us are trying to learn something. Gawd your parents made your rude. They should be ashamed. Worst parenting ever.
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