Not to Be: Top 10 Things that Should Be UnInvented
June 5th 2011 17:42
Have you ever been awakened at 6AM on Sunday, when you wanted to sleep-in, by a very loud leaf blower? Has it ever occurred to you that leaf blowers are not, at least as far as you are concerned, an improvement over a broom and dust pan or a garden rake and a garden waste bag? Have you never thought that considering the noise and pollution that the marginal utility of the common leaf blower is negative at best. We’d be better off if they have never been invented.
There are a number of things that I think the world would have been better off if they had never been:
1) Political Parties
2) Noisy Leaf Blowers
3) Public Employee Unions
4) Mosquitoes
5) Flies
6) Maggots
7) Politicians
8) Reality TV
9) Speculators
10) Social Diseases
There are so many also-rans.
Bad Ideas Whose Time has Gone:
A) Telemarketers
B) The Global Warming Hoax
C) The Fraud that is Climate Change
D) Fire Ants
E) Kudzu
F) Bureaucrats
G) Unelected Government Officials who can ruin your life
H) Soda Pop and Soda Water
I) Artificial Sweeteners
J) Noisy cooling fans
K) Computers that overheat and shut down
L) User Interfaces that require 6 or more button clicks to do anything
M) Racism
N) Portable toilets
O) Tailgaters
P) Foreign call centers
R) Dog crap
S) Rude store clerks
T) Slow Internet
U) Slow computer
V) SPAM
W) Viagra Spam
X) Stubbing your toe
Y) Noisy neighbors
Z) Recessions
In retrospect some of these are more annoyances than strictly things to be uninvented, but I feel I am on a roll…
AA) Automated phone systems
AB) Smoking
AC) Pay Parking
AD) Burnt Popcorn
AE) Fishy leftovers in the microwave
AF) Paying for anything you hate like getting your car towed
AG) Speed bumps
AH) Marxist Media–In other words all media
AI) Able bodied male moochers
AJ) Icy streets and sidewalks
AK) Mold
AL) Mildew
AM) Rotting food at the bottom of the trash can in the middle of summer
AN) PETA–Except for the clothing optional girls
AO) Akward silence–usually means I should not be there but I have to anyway
***
Congressman Weiner and the Moron Detector
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Comment by katyzzz
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Correction: smokers instead of smoking.
Good one.